BONDING.

 Hello, my gist mates.

Long time no see, how has been your week? Mine was quite eventful, from having light issues, watching movies, trying to penetrate the tiktok space, attending Smirnoff concert by weekend which has not really gone well with me because I have been unnecessary hunger since that concert ended but hopefully I get back myself. I also have 6 outing that I am looking forward to next weekend but of course I wont be attending all of them because I don't have a car. I would have to prioritize and save up for car towards next year.

Attending these events trigger this post about bonding. How do you bond with people as an individual? What are the things you do or share with people that you trust? For some it may be sharing of food, going to parties together, shopping together etc. Personally, I don't like to share my stuff with anyone so if I give you access to my stuffs, I can classify it as bonding with you.

One of the ways I bonded with my mum growing up was through making her hair, she does mine too and those are the times we share gist and be safe space to each other. My mum likes her hair being played with that anytime she wants to sleep she calls me to play with her hair, either by combing it or making cornrows and that woman hair was healthy. I have also pass that hair bonding to my sister because I actually want it to be a family ritual. Whenever she's coming home, I make sure my hair is out for her to play with and I also help with her hair and we get to unwind while at it. 

We also do a lot of bonding by trying new recipe together, watching movies and sharing our thoughts while at it, we make jest of each other before outsider make jest of us, we share secrets and we also hype ourselves up. We don't bond over suffering, we rather pay to ease our stress.

Bonding play a big part on ones memory because when you are no more, one of the things you remember for are those bonds you share with people. One of the ways I am bonding with y'll is to share my experience and gist with you because I don't want to be quickly forgotten whenever its time for me to live.

Song for the Anchovy by Kizz Daniel

THINGS I ALWAYS HAVE MONEY FOR IN MY 30'S

 Hello my gist mates, 

I don't want to call you gossip mates again because gossiping is a bad behavior but gisting with your friends is not a bad thing and if you read my blog, you are considered my friend.

If you don't know, I am in my 30's especially "early 30's" and I am the stage where I prioritize my comfort and peace of mind above anything and if I have my way, I would employ 10 people that will just be taking care of me left and right but I don't have my way and a girl can only wish. I also have little money to get things done so I can try to invest in my comfort and these are few things I always have money for.

1. HEALTH

 As we all know that health is wealth and I prioritize my health (physically and mentally) over anything as I hate discomfort, so I can never be too broke or stingy not to take care of myself. I don't care the amount of medication as long as It is going to help me out of inconvenience, I would have money to get it and that is period.

2. FOOD

I have never loved cooking even though I am a good cook, so I always have money for food because babygirl is going to eat even if the economy is collapsing. I am quick to bring out money when I am buying my meal both raw and cooked, I don't even calculate how much is leaving my account when I do. Food is my bestie and it takes 70% of my income. No jokes.

3. FUN

Everyone version of fun is different meaning what is fun for me may not be fun for you. I like to allocate fund to my fun every other day or if someone is inviting me to my kind of fun, you would never hear me say I cant show up because of money. I would look for the money by fire by force because a child that works well must enjoy well.

4. VEX MONEY

I do not go out without my vex money, it doesn't matter if I am hanging out with a male or female because sometime, you really need to book your cab and disappear without traces instead of being at the mercy of someone. Having your money will save you from public disgrace anytime, so before you step out, check your account balance just incase.

5. DATA

I am a movie lover, that is one of the best way I relax at home and to see a movie you must have plenty data. I also use my data for social media so I would know what's going on out there and of course to prevent boredom, isolation and also connect with family. I never want to be out of reach from those that matters to me. You can never catch me without data.

6. FAMILY EMERGENCIES/BILLS

There is always money for family and emergencies even if I would be sacrificing my meals for a while, those that matters to me would always get what they want. I have money available for everyone that matters to me, without them, life would be difficult for me. I also like to pay my bills because I don't like embarrassment from any one in any way. I don't like my name being called where they owe money.

These are the top things I always have money for no matter how broke I am, the money would come out. There are others but they are not as important because I can function without them but these tops the list.

Let me know what you prioritize with your income/ what you always have money for in the comment section. Lets chitchat like the gist mate we are.

P.S; If you have a story you want to feature on my blog anonymously or with your full chest, you can send it to my email opeyemiaremu0@gmail.com.

Song for the day Baba by Dj Spinall ft Kizz Daniel

I love you 

SHARED APARTMENT AND ITS SHENENIGANS

 Happy weekend my gist partners, we made it.

I woke up to the death of one of my Facebook and also my co-tenants settling fights this early Saturday morning that I should stay longer in bed and be wrapped in a mans arms. Lets get straight into todays blog.

I may be old school or talking from a place of privilege, pardon me. I don't see the reason why 2-4 strangers should live in the same apartment indefinitely without knowing each other prior just to cut cost. I said it because someone has to say it. Now this is very common in Lagos and 'in the abroad'. "In the abroad", there are law that protect tenants and you can only rent through the Landlord, meaning you are covered, you do not sublet from tenant but over here a tenant can just say he/she is tired of solely paying rent/bills or can no more afford it, they will start looking for who to share their apartment with.

Housing situation is very expensive, I won't dispute that but allowing someone you don't know to come and live with you indefinitely is more expensive because there a lot of what ifs and as someone that prioritize her peace of mind over everything, I would run from living with someone I don't know from anywhere to share bills with.

The person can be doing something shady, thieves, have underlying health challenges, poor hygiene, bad character, evil spirit. As much as I do not believe in Witchcraft, I believe some people are very wicked and we were raised differently. Even siblings have different personality not to talk of someone you don't know. You could come home at night and your part of the house got burnt because you choose to live with a stranger or you meet the person dead, how are you going to redeem yourself?

Do not get me wrong, you can also share apartment with a stranger and they will graduate from housemates to friend or family but it is very scarce in this society because most young people are always in unnecessary competition with the next person. You may be running on your own lane and someone is doing everything within their power to pull you down.

This my cotenants they share a 3 bedroom and it's every time one noise or the other, sometimes I pay attention and other days, I mind my business. I don't live with them so I cant say for a fact this is what is happening but I know some of the noise would have been avoided if they live separately. Apart from the fact that I enjoy my own company, this is one of the reasons that I can't allow someone that is not family live with me indefinitely.

Let me know, can you share your apartment with someone indefinitely doesn't matter if they contribute towards the bill or not, or you are like me, one man mopol. Share your thoughts in the comment.

Thanks for always coming back to read my thoughts. I love you too.

PS: If you want to contribute to this blog either by sharing your stories or in any other way, you can send an email at opeyemiaremu0@gmail.com. 

Song for the day: Bank of America by Seyi vibes

THE DAY I GOT PREGNANT. PART 1.

Just kidding.

I didn't know the day I got pregnant but I took in within 2 months of my physical exposure to sex because I have only watched it on video but never practiced.

Growing up, I had promised myself that I would start having sex when I turned 21 and that was what I did but without sex education. A very big mistake, but don't blame me here, I am an old woman.😜

A little back story, I had an extra year in school which means I had enough time to explore, what did they say about the Idle mind? The Idle mind led me to meet one guy that was as Idle as me. He is older and had explore sex. I cant remember how he convinced me to have sex with me but we started somewhere.

He would take me to his friends place, damn, I have taken a lot of risk in my life, no wonder My mum was doing vigil back to back. I didn't even have a standard because I remember in one of our escapades, I had giving him my money to pay for an hotel for us. 'upcoming sugar mummy'

My introduction to sex was so good that I started being the one to reach out to him for sex 'feminist' so we were having it back to back, he even at a point introduced me to alcohol and he would buy me TomTom when we are going back home.

Where were my parents? I actually told them I was going to the library so they didn't know any of this. Princess Horpsy 

One of my old school mate reached out to me and I also had sex with him that period, remember that I was not sexually educated so I was just 'enjoying' myself, jumping from one man to the other, while lying to everyone except me, till I couldn't find my period that February.

I actually did not need a soothsayer to formally inform me that I am pregnant. 😂😂😂😂. Back then, test strip wasn't common but deep within me I knew this was the cockroach women always swallow. I had never missed my period except that month so that was definitely it.

I found out on my way back to school to go and rewrite my failed courses. (mad oh) I couldn't tell anyone.

Plot twist, I had a Boyfriend in a serious relationship with and we were both keeping ourselves till marriage. 😂😂😂 We don't live in the same state, the plan was to go from home, spend some days with him before I proceed to school. My parent did not also know about this, I can see your eyes, dont judge me.

Remember, I had started having sex without my boyfriends knowledge and I have been enjoying it so I had hinted him that when I come we should try it since I planned to have it at 21 anyways, so lets make it happen. He was also excited and was anticipating for when I would land. 

To God be the Glory, I landed with pregnancy.

Let me know if you enjoyed this so I can publish the remaining part.

Song of the day Ekaette by Maye Hunta

#hermotherdaughter #myfirstpregnancy #princesshorpsy #Nigerian